stop.

there have been a lot less thoughts on here then i would like, but its simply because i can never stop. my brain doesn't quit working and sometimes its very hard to pin down exactly what i want to say. i think a thought... but wait! then another, but wait! and another, but wait! wait! wait! 

stop.

today has been a quiet, melancholy day. im finding my studies have began to change me.
as an anthropology student, i am constantly learning about people and the world. not of equations or fairytales or experiments, but of real people that actually live their lives and their love. i am learning of history and about places beyond here and people who i will never meet but who i would have thought i was much better then. i learn of 8 million being reduced to 15,000. i learn of 21 hour work days. i learn about how we have said MY ways, MY clothes, MY religion. and i learn that we were wrong when we said "it will make your life better! we swear." because that turned into boiling limbs and "sorry to say, but your babies are gonna die." wait! i wish we could reverse the past and turn the world back around, like superman. because all i want to do is hold their faces and say "im sorry, im sorry, im sorry. i love you, i love you, i love you, because no one else ever has" or, i wonder if we can actually change our future. i dont want this to keep happening and i dont want to stand still. i think all we want is CHANGE. but we are standing still and change is not among us. and they, they cant want anything because they may never get it. OUR world, OUR technology, OUR money. money money money money. we havnt changed at all.(the pictures far too big to look at kid, your eyes wont open wide enough.)

wait! wait! wait!

i wish i could be a writer... but i never use capitals and 

stop.