Tuesday, November 4, 2008

during the day, it seems all of my emotions come in bursts. they say "poof!" and they are gone. i cannot think during the day, there are too many beep beeps and speak speaks and distractions. the world moves too fast. the night is when i come alive. this is the only time i can adjust and focus. the time when i can stay hidden from those who are the not i. i can keep myself away from the prying eyes of "them". night is when i see what i want to see - this is when i can be tucked inside myself and i can be it. i can be whole. this is when i thrive.
right now i am naked and cold, but i am here. i am aware and i am alive. yet i fear that when the sun comes up (though i will be warm again,) my mind will go numb. my own me will disappear.

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